They say that we become the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Think about this in your own life for a moment. Who are the 5 people you interact with most? Get truly honest about how your behavior and thinking changes as you spend more time around certain people. I have spent a lot of time thinking about this throughout my own life, now more than ever before as I go through some profound life transformations. With more and more information coming to light about generational trauma and the behavioral impacts of the people we spend our time with, we are gaining more understanding of the profound impact that mentors can have on our lives. Whether formal or informal, the mentors we look up to help shape who we become in life, and I am dedicated to ensuring that impact is as positive and transformative as possible for the people I get the privilege to influence in this life.
So, mentorship… What’s the purpose? Do you need a mentor?
Growing up, I had a few great mentors. My parents, of course, had a massive impact both directly and indirectly on the person who I am today. I also had more of a formal mentor in the form of a martial arts instructor. This man shaped me in ways that I was only able to conceptualize later in life. From the age of 5, this mentor instilled principles, beliefs, skills, and core values into my being. He taught me humility, courage, discipline, determination, leadership and so much more. He pushed me to my limits and taught me that there was more to me than I could see. He consistently encouraged me to be the version of myself that I didn’t see was possible yet – he pushed me to live out the potential I held. He taught me martial arts; how to fight, to perform, to build the foundational skills of the art. But, with so much more importance, he led me to be the person I was capable of being and didn’t let me settle for anything less.
Mentorship is more than just imparting lessons. The mentor does not simply tell you what to do to become successful; It’s about helping to understand yourself, it’s about guidance, and it's about leading by example. A mentor challenges you to be better while creating a safe and nurturing environment where individuals can explore their potential and flourish through those challenges. They are often someone to look up to because they are living the principles that are admirable and respectable. Everyone deserves the space to grow and evolve continuously, and a valuable mentor will provide that space.
Later in life, I found myself other valuable mentors. I worked with business coaches, listened to self help tapes and podcasts, read books and surrounded myself with people who were beacons to the life I wanted to live. A mentor comes in many shapes and sizes. It might be a co-worker who sees your value and supports you to succeed, a partner in life that challenges you to grow as a person, or a friend that keeps you feeling positive. Mentors can be a community of people online or in-person, a sports team, a group of friends, or a formal gathering of like-minded people dedicated to networking for personal growth. Mentors can also be formal, paid for; coaches, instructors, a new fitness class, or mental health experts.
I was fortunate in my life. My parents placed me into an environment that provided a strong mentor who curated a powerful community of mentors and support in martial arts. When I look back at the various things I have achieved, the challenges I have overcome to this point, It’s very clear to me how the power of mentorship got me here. We do all need help. We all need support in life and we cannot go about this alone. The power is not in the mentor solely though, the power is in you. You get to choose who you surround yourself with. You get to decide on those life mentors. Decide today whether you continue down the same path. Creating the life you want involves the communities that support that life.
Who are your mentors in life? Who are the people the lift you up or weigh you down? Do you need to add more positive influence? Who are you a mentor to in your life?
These are important questions to consider when you are looking to grow as an individual.
Your opportunities are endless, you just have to go after it!
Written by: Kyle Craik
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